Blah blah blah, he has the flu, oh my stars and garters. Wait, what's this? The Vulture?! What nefarious deeds will he do while he has free reign over the city?...live action?
He'll be getting some live action?
Well, if a man's been in prison for so long, you can't blame him for wanting to get some live action. At least it's not unalive action... dead action, I guess. That would be pretty screwed up, but fantastic to see in a daily newspaper strip. Take that, old people!
By the way, the reason we get weeks upon weeks of boring is because old people dislike fisticuffs, or so the newspapers think. Considering how Stan Lee is pretty old, then he presumably knows that the newspaper demographic wants.
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Friday, May 9, 2008
NEW YORK (AP) -- The long-running comic strip The Amazing Spider-Man was suddenly pulled today from the final 37 papers in which it appeared. Editors say that Friday's strip was the last straw, claiming that the previous day's promise by the supervillain known as "The Vulture" that he was going to find "some live action tonight" led to an unsavory three-panel sequence involving a flock of pigeons, leather chaps, and a roll of duct tape.
Gee, and here I thought the reason there was so little action in this strip was that (a) Stan Lee lost his fastball years ago, and (b) the size of newspaper strips doesn't allow for anything other than two people talking.
But yeah, I can see how old people accustomed to "Ziggy" and "Family Circus" could be a tad offended by an all-out fistfight, or a truly nefarious super-villain-style plot. Even so, if Stan Lee hadn't lost his fastball years ago, he could surely come up with plots that are low on violence, but far more interesting than this sludge.
When I see a masked villain talking about live action, I can only assume he's looking for strippers or prostitutes. My guess is prostitutes, and that's what landed him in jail in the first place.
No, he is in NY and he wants live action. He is going to see "Mama Mia!" What else would he want? All those years in prison made him want to hear some Abba songs.
Then he is going to see "Spamalot" and finish the day by seeing "Rent".
Oh god. He'll wind up going to Mary Jane's play, falling hopelessly in love with her.
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