Saturday, May 31, 2008

Not a Broken Promise

The promise was that Spider-Man would not tackle the Vulture until Peter got over the flu. Nothing was said about appearing on talk shows. Also: I've never heard the term "blue-skying it", but you can be sure I'll try to work it into my daily conversations.

Ah, and new "Venture Brothers" is here!

Friday, May 30, 2008

Maria's Back in Town

I'm still enjoying this far more than the sick Peter/idiot Vulture story-lines.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Jameson's Story of Loss?

Might we be getting an answer to the mystery first revealed in this set of strips? In all honesty, I'm far more intrigued by this than whatever Spider-Man or the Vulture are up to. Bring on Jameson's story of loss, Stan Lee. I'm ready.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

The Return of Maria Lopez

Maria Lopez is pretty much the last thing I expected to see today, or ever again. As you can see, Jameson is also quite surprised.

...I hope the Vulture kills her.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

TARGET: Peter Parker

At this point, there is really no possible way Peter isn't going to get his butt kicked by someone. Mary Jane might do it because he keeps trying to find loopholes to allow him to sneak out and go fight the Vulture with a clean conscience. Jonah Jameson would do it since Peter isn't getting him photos. The Vulture might do it if Peter ever gets out there to fight him. If Peter doesn't end up in a crumpled heap at some point during all of this, I'm going to be quite surprised.

Monday, May 26, 2008

Better Headline

The headline is a far better slant to what happened concerning Spider-Man's inability to show up. Also, Jameson is still acting how he's supposed to. It's the small things that make the strip better, really.

Sunday, May 25, 2008


Spider-Man likes to dream that his enemies are somewhat competent (what's in the mysterious brown satchel? State secrets? Diamonds?) and that he's about ten times more competent than they are, apparently. Also, at this point, Mary Jane should be wearing more... conservative sleepwear. I would want as much clothing as possible between me and the dreaded Spider-Flu.

Anyway, it should be nice to see Jonah Jameson doing what he does best- trashing Spider-Man- for a little while. Note I say "should", as there's a good chance things will get screwed up.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Metapost: Late Update

The update on Sunday will be a bit late. No idea how late at this point, but it should be up by late afternoon/early evening.


Robbie's dialog in panel one just seems sort of muddled. It makes sense, yes, but it just doesn't seem natural. What surprises me most about today's strip is that we're well into into the next storyline and they're calling back to a previous one. Some people out there are going to be wondering, "Oh my goodness, what is this Krandis thing they're talking about?" and they'll go into Google and type in Krandis, and you know what pops up? An entry from this blog. Thanks, Mister Lee.

Ah, and panel three has the most hideously deformed Jonah Jameson I've ever seen. He looks like a mix between Groucho Marx, Adolph Hitler, and Frankenstein's monster.

Friday, May 23, 2008

Spider-Man Wasn't Here

All right, this is just bizarre. In order for the Vulture to make Spider-Man look like a wimp, wouldn't Spider-Man have to be there? The same goes for Jameson's claim, as Spider-Man wasn't even there to try to stop the Vulture, and therefore, had no chance to do so. So, instead of making Spider-Man look like a wimp, the Vulture merely made Spider-Man look apathetic to the plight of the rich. This goes for Jameson's claim as well, as the Webhead (why is he using a pet name for someone he hates?) merely didn't show up to stop the Vulture. Now, whether making Spider-Man look apathetic is worse than making him look wear is an entirely different debate.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Metapost: Yet Another Attempt to Advertise

Once again, you should really check out Choose Your Own Blogventure because people say it's rather nifty. By people, I mean only one person has ever said anything about it.

Also, if you're at all interested in a look at the actual person who runs this Blog, then you should check out Third Attempt. You can find out more about me by reading it, though right now I'm basically just complaining about things. So it's just like what I do here, just with my actual life instead.

Broken Promise...?

Technically, he was only thinking of going out as Spider-Man, so no promise was broken. I think. He may have promised not to even think of going out as Spider-Man, but it's two in the morning and I'm too tired to check.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008


Okay, for some reason I found the middle panel here really funny. It still doesn't really mean Mary Jane was right to quit her play, because actors should be able to get used to things like this. If an actor quit a show every time they got heckled, the world would have no more actors in it, after all. Mary Jane is obviously not cut out for this, as she looks as if she's dead inside in the third panel.

Heh heh... that second panel.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008


2) You totally overreacted there, Mary Jane. One bad night and you quit? Maybe you don't have what it takes to be an actress.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Not a Flop (Yet)

Just the dreaded Monday recap. I would like to point out that Marvella hasn't yet flopped. It could still do a fair bit of business on the DVD market. After all, isn't something a flop only if it's failed to make money despite being released?

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Direct to DVD Dilemma

At this point and time, this strip has no likable characters in its main cast. Our supposed hero is even less effective than usual, down with the flu. The main female lead, who so recently proved her authority by forcing her husband to stay in bed, is now in tears because the audience did not like her because her movie is going directly to DVD. All the while our current villain is content to rob rooftop parties, using a gun to menace people. Also, our current villain is a man who utilizes a flying suit which traditionally has razor-sharp wings. Yet he's menacing people with a gun. I hope some bit character pops in soon that will bring a ray of sunshine to this dreariness.

Also, I'd like to say something about the direct to DVD market. I was at Wal-Mart earlier tonight, browsing through the movies. A lot of them were direct to DVD, and they all cost just as much, if not more, than the normal movies. Not to mention the fact that the DVD market may cover a larger area than a theater release. Look at the movie "Rogue". It's getting an extremely limited release, so you'll be lucky to find it in a theater near you. Yet, when it comes out on DVD, you know darn well it'll be nearly everywhere. So while Mary Jane won't get to see her name in lights, she will get some amount of recognition. What I'm saying is that this strip is putting a very poor light on direct to DVD movies.

Besides, Mary Jane should really hold off on making any judgments about this until she sees the DVD. And even if it's bad, it's not like it'll never be seen. There's many people who enjoy bad movies (myself among them), and Mary Jane will find out if her acting was really atrocious or not.

What I'm saying here is that Mary Jane should buck up and see what happens, as it's far from over for her. The audience, for the most part, probably didn't even care about her drop in status. It may have just been a bad audience. So buck up, Mary Jane. Things should clear up for you in no time.

(Sorry for the rambling nature of today's post. It's so late that it's early and I am tired, but wanted to get this up so it would be up during the day.)

(Also, Mary Jane is probably going to get the flu from Peter. I'm not totally certain, but any flu that could get through Peter's enhanced immune system is probably quite strong, and a normal person should have pretty much no chance of escaping it.)

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Metapost: Trouble Looming

I've been doing some thinking about this whole daily update thing. I mean, it'll be no problem for most of them, but there'll be the bit where I'm moving that'll be sort of difficult to do much of anything on the computer. It's not going to be for another few months, yes, but that's at least one or two days when I won't be able to do daily updates. I mean, not only will my computer not be hooked up and my internet not be running for a day or two, but after spending a day moving various bits of furniture and boxes full of multimedia, I probably won't be able to get anywhere to do the blog. However, a pledge is a pledge, even if I sort of have to change it around a little bit. So, if things go well, there will still be daily updates. I just might not be the one doing them, once or twice.

The short version of this is, I need someone to back me up on this when backing up is needed. You know, like if I get sick or have business to take care of which means I can't get to a computer. Like moving. If you're interested, e-mail me at and we'll set something up.

I'm going to try to remain as unbiased as possible for this, so everyone's got a pretty equal chance. The deadline for contacting me about trying out is June 15th, 2008.

Amazingly Dull and Inane

I just have to say that I really don't like where this is going. I mean, it seems like it can't get any more dull or inane, but that's the amazing thing about this strip- it will always get more dull or inane.

Friday, May 16, 2008

A Happy Day

What? Can it be? We're actually being spared Spider-Man going out sick and attempting to return home before Mary Jane? A happy day indeed! She's the true heroine of this strip.

Thursday, May 15, 2008


Then you wait until he does something worse than robbing some rich folk. Seriously, I know that with great power comes great responsibility, but you're sick. You need to take time to recuperate. If he starts trying to kill people, actively trying to kill people, then you can go web-sling after him. Until then, just take it easy.

Metapost: Pledge

It has been over a month since I missed a daily update. Granted, some of the updates were pretty shoddy (shoddier than normal, at least) but I have a good reason for that which I will not bore you with unless you really want to hear it. Now, in about five months (give or take a day) this Blog will somehow be up for two years, making it the longest thing I've ever consecutively kept up with. Therefore, I pledge to you, the reader, that I will not miss a daily update. Not ever again, but at least until October 16th.

I will face down overwhelming odds (Work! School! Moving! Personal problems! Unforeseen difficulties!) to write down not very snarky or funny comments about this strip every day. I'm honestly surprised this Blog is all that popular and that people actually read it regularly. In any case, thanks for reading everyone! Here's counting down to the big... 2!

(Also, check out my other two blogs where my psychoses and general writing skill become apparent! Third Attempt and Choose Your Own Blogventure!)

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Television Rots the Mind

Always with the stinking television. I wish his television set would just explode so he'd actually have to look for crimes to stop. I mean, right now, yes. This is about the only acceptable reason Spider-Man should be watching television: because he has the flu. Yet I can't appreciate that because he's always watching the stinking television. Now he's going to go out as Spider-Man despite his promise, all while trying to be back before Mary Jane comes home.

This will not work.

Even if he makes it back home before she does, it will not work.

You know why?



You know the best part? The very best part? If they go that route, then we'll have the next five months consisting of about two hours in strip. You just can't win with this strip. You just can't win.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Vulture: Menace to Language

Argh, it's even worse when the Vulture is using stupid bits of slang! The man is butchering every bit of the English language he can get his beak around, and these people are shouting for Spider-Man to save them. Screw Spider-Man, people, he's sleeping at home in bed. We need Curtis Langsley, Action Librarian. He'd catalog the Vulture right back into jail, he would.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Not Dick Tracy

We know he's not Dick Tracy, since he's not dressed in yellow and his body has rounded edges. Also, is this the first we've seen of the Vulture's need for revenge against Spider-Man? I think it is, but the Vulture seems to be forgetting one thing: Spider-Man can swing from a web. Therefore, unless the Vulture puts some serious hurt on Spider-Man (or just hits him in the head with a lead pipe or falling brick, really), then Spider-Man will most likely not hit the street.

Then again, Spider-Man could run out of webbing or do the idiotic thing and go out while suffering from the flu. Which is also a possibility.

Land Captain in... "Choose Your Own Blogventure"

Land Captain is currently the star of "Choose Your Own Blogventure." So go check it out, if you like.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

The Vulture is a Putz

The Vulture is so nonthreatening that some normal guy is willing to tackle and taunt him. This makes him at best a B-level villain, but the fact that the Vulture dropped him only about twenty feet (still painful, but probably not fatal) drops him down to a C. He has low goals, no threat level, and an unwillingness to commit any crime greater than theft. No longer he was in a normal guy prison, this Vulture is pretty much a complete putz.

As for Peter Parker, well, with a putz like Drago running around, he can pretty much take as much time to recuperate at he likes.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Numbered List!

Numbered list time, readers!
1) The Vulture makes a stupid mistake, as his forte is quick-strikes, not... well, not this. Anything but this. The folly of his actions is proven in the third panel, where what's probably a high-ranking police officer tackles the Vulture.
2) The Vulture is using his gun. Traditionally, those wings are razor-tipped and he can slice through a lot of things with them. He does not need a gun.
3) That's not Birdman. That's the Vulture. Birdman is a superhero-turned-lawyer. Birdman would probably make an infinitely better comic strip, as well, at least the lawyer version.

Friday, May 09, 2008


Vulture steals costume jewelry from Mary Worth while Alfred Pennyworth stands idly by. Vulture stretches for pun! Film at eleven!

Also, the Vulture has some pretty kinky ideas about getting live action, it would seem.

Thursday, May 08, 2008

Live Action

Blah blah blah, he has the flu, oh my stars and garters. Wait, what's this? The Vulture?! What nefarious deeds will he do while he has free reign over the city? action?

He'll be getting some live action?

Well, if a man's been in prison for so long, you can't blame him for wanting to get some live action. At least it's not unalive action... dead action, I guess. That would be pretty screwed up, but fantastic to see in a daily newspaper strip. Take that, old people!

By the way, the reason we get weeks upon weeks of boring is because old people dislike fisticuffs, or so the newspapers think. Considering how Stan Lee is pretty old, then he presumably knows that the newspaper demographic wants.

Wednesday, May 07, 2008


This better not lead to Peter adopting another secret identity just so he can face down the Vulture and still keep his promise. Seriously!

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Bargain Till

Peter has been driven mad by his fever. At no point does Mary Jane make any sort of bargain with him, she only issues commands. She does, however, take joy in this. We should fear her.

Ah, and in the second panel? That "till" should only have one "l". Unless she wants the soil tilled, or something? I dunno.

Monday, May 05, 2008


Mary Jane doesn't want to see a flu-infected Peter stupidly fight the Vulture, as such a thing would be quite cliched and whatnot.

Sunday, May 04, 2008


05/03:Surprisingly, Mary Jane convinced Peter to go to bed instead of going out to fight the nefarious Vulture. Not surprisingly, it'll take more than one night to cure Peter's illness.

05/04:This whole thing is just an exercise in padding. The whole illness probably won't have any actual bearing on the plot, other than making us spend a week watching Mary Jane convince Peter to stay in bed.

Friday, May 02, 2008

Whiny Peter

Peter is just going to keep whining and whining until he gets his way, then we'll get a lame fight where Peter gets his butt kicked. He'll then FINALLY listen to his wife and take some bed-rest, so he can then go back and beat the Vulture. Why doesn't he just recuperate now so he'll be battle-ready sooner?

Thursday, May 01, 2008

Pre-Emptive Strike

While the Vulture has broken out of jail and that might be cause for alarm, he technically hasn't done anything other than fly around yet. Now, if he starts stealing stuff or murdering people, then Spider-Man can start worrying. Until then, he should just take a rest.